Like many of us at the start of lockdown I had all grand designs of being productive. Start chipping away at some of the things we have been putting off for ages. We all have those types of chores that we procrastinate over. I’ve never been any good at staying indoors all day so I knew I would have to keep myself occupied with something. Because I already work from home not too much would change for me except I couldn’t go cold water swimming and travel. Scrolling through social media feeds it was obvious that I wasn’t the only one wanting to tackle lockdown with optimism and gusto. We’re now on day 17640391 of this enforced stay at home regime and I’ve lost all concept of what day it is. I wanted to share with you my Insta vs reality during lockdown so far.

With the Instagram version being all positive and shiny and hugely filtered. The reality being what I have or haven’t managed to do despite trying.

Productivity

Insta

At the start I thought it would be a good use of my time to write about some of our road trips across Scotland. The one’s that were not work for me. To this end, I would also need to edit more photographs, ones that were taken on the aforementioned trips.

I have also been taking wee video clips on my phone with the aim of making a full vlog or video for my YouTube channel. Giving me something to focus on whilst I am out walking. It’s also been a great way to notice how much things have changed in just two months.

Reality

It seems I am finding it difficult to write about travel at the moment. I’ve started writing a post about Shetland and my words just aren’t there. This has then meant I still have a backlog of photos to edit. Maybe, subconsciously I am finding it too hard not knowing when any of us will travel again?

The video clips have remained on my phone taking up space. In my mind I’m keep telling myself the more I have, the more it documents this time in our lives. Who am I kidding? I just haven’t bothered.

I have also had days where I haven’t been bothered to do ANYTHING. I’ve binged watched Netflix series and documentaries. Some mind-numbing but others inspiring and motivational. Then there’s TikTok. There, I said it. I joined TikTok and hours of my life have vanished! I’m aware that I am way too old to be on this app but in dark times it has made me belly laugh harder than I have in a long time and for that I am grateful.

That said, we have managed to get a few jobs around the house and garden done, so it’s not all bad.

Insch Golf Course. Golfer walking with clubs
NOT TAKEN DURING LOCKDOWN

Exercise

Insta

I follow so many inspiring, adventurous outdoor loving people across all my feeds. At the start of lockdown so many of them did their best to create goals and challenges (and to continue to do so). There have been stair summits to Snowdon and Everest that I have followed with awe and wonder. Climbing their stairs at home or doing step ups in the garden in full expedition gear, to the summit height of their chosen mountain.

I had grand designs of starting yoga. This has been on my list of things to try/do for some time, not just because I’m bored in the house and I’m in the house bored! I’ve downloaded apps, put on the clothes with the most stretch to give it a try. Even pulled my hair back in to a messy bun like all the cool cats and kittens.

We dusted off our bicycles, gave them a bit of tlc. Took them out for a spin around the block (about 1 mile) to ensure they were okay to take further afield. At the start of lockdown the roads were a much safer place to cycle.

Me out for a bike ride wearing a helmet

Reality

Whilst fellow cold water swimmers went out and bought paddling pools so they could continue to get their fix, I was eyeing up the burn at the end of the drive! Not even kidding. I didn’t get as far as contemplating using the wheelie bin because that’s just an accident waiting to happen. Instead I have had cold showers. They don’t come anywhere near giving me what I get out of swimming in a loch, but it’s scratched an itch.

Here in Scotland we have been allowed one hour each day to exercise outdoors. The summit stair challenge didn’t really take my fancy, I knew I would get bored quickly. Walking outside and getting to know our local area has been a constant surprise. Most days I have walked the same variation of a few circular routes. Switching it up by following tracks through fields that we’ve never walked down before. Then once a week (usually on Dude’s days off) we have done a bigger walk. You can read about those here.

During this week’s longer walk I had a bit of a melt down. It was roasting, we’d already been out for a couple of hours. Dude suggested taking an unknown “shortcut” back toward home. Any other time I trust him implicitly but something didn’t look right. Climbing over a thin wire fence to start which I managed. I didn’t fancy walking through gorse so I said no – he forgets I’m a wider load than he is! The straw that broke the camel’s back though was walking into a bog (even after all this dry weather). I ended up calf deep and raging.

Looking back now I realise that my response was probably a tad irrational. I’d worked myself up into a blubbering mess to the point I could barely breathe. A complete over reaction. Maybe an  underlying pent up anxiety about lockdown. Needless to say we spent most of the walk back home in silence. We hardly ever argue, I hate it and soon “make friends” again!

The bikes. Well they haven’t seen the light of day again. The traffic has since grown again and there have been many cases of idiots speeding. One numpty got caught doing 132mph on the motorway that runs near us!

View of trees from Castle law Fort Perthshire

Keeping in touch

Insta

I would like to think I am quite good at keeping in touch with friends and family. Because our families are way down south as are many of our friends we make a conscious effort to keep in touch.

People have been creative in their social gatherings during lockdown. Video call quizzes, drinks and even Sunday lunch with family. Everyone making an effort by getting dressed up as if they were going out normally.

Reality

One of my lovely friends messaged me recently to see if I wanted to FaceTime. Much to her surprise I said no. That’s not me being rude and it’s not that I don’t want to see her smiley face, I just don’t like it. We hadn’t done anything like that before lockdown, so why now (I don’t mean particular friend, just in general)? Saying no did make me feel a bit guilty but not enough to change my mind.

We received a package recently from friends containing all sorts of goodies. A Six Nations Rugby jacket in Dude’s size, two mugs and a rugby ball signed by the Scotland rugby team. Not a care package as such but made us smile nontheless.

I have sent cards to a few people. For no particular reason other than, just because. Writing a few words and letting loved ones know we’re thinking of them I think is a strong gesture. In a digital world receiving a card speaks volumes.

Friends visiting Inverness, Scotland
NOT TAKEN DURING LOCKDOWN

Insta vs reality during lockdown

So that’s pretty much been my Insta vs reality during lockdown, so far at least. I’m a pretty optimistic, glass half full kinda person and at the start I was terrified of how my mind would cope with staying at home. None of us knew how this would effect us and we are by no means near any light at the end of the tunnel.

We should be kind to ourselves and one another. If that means one day at a time, then take one day at a time. Bite sized chunks.

I’m no expert but I know that by being outside I have allowed my mind time to switch off. Not to be governed by the news or social media and it’s pure magic. To engage with nature and learn more about me. All of us are muddling through. We shouldn’t be fooled by the perfect smiles on our newsfeeds.

In the words of Kit de Luca (film: Pretty Woman) “take care of you.”

Wooden gates with yellow gorse in the background